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What's the difference?

Thoughts on making a real difference in the lives of learners...

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What if parents acted like schools?

3/11/2015

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Schools pride themselves on their ability to act as surrogate parents. The Latin expression in loco parentis has long been used as the legal principle giving schools the right and responsibility to act "in place of the parent" and has been loosely defined by educators as giving them the power to make decisions in the manner of a kind and judicious parent. It is used to govern classroom management, administrative disciplinary decisions, school excursions, etc. Schools, in essence, see themselves as taking over the role of parenting from 8:30 to 3:30 while your children are in their care.

But what if in loco parentis were reversed? What if, rather than schools acting like parents, parents acted like schools? How might that work?

Well, to begin with, activities around the home would have to be quite a bit more regimented. Perhaps you could install bells or chimes to indicate when it was time to move from one activity to another. Buzz, "sorry kids, Lego time is over - let's move on to colouring between the lines"; buzz, "let's go run around the yard" (that's the royal let's - you kids run - I'll time you); buzz, "time to eat"; buzz, "stop eating, whether or not you are finished, and go outside in the rain", etc.

Sibling rivalry would be a thing of the past, as every child would be treated exactly the same.  (Now in fairness, a friend of mine did treat her two children exactly the same in spite of their three year age gap. It was certainly entertaining to see a 1 year old get a Fisher Price "Alpha Probe" to match his 4 year old brother's Christmas wish!)


Everything your child did would be assessed and reported on, parents could post charts showing which child was the best in each of a number of arbitrary categories: top bed maker; dish clearer; tooth brusher; etc. and issue press releases for each swimming level mastered or consecutive successful visits to the dentist. Any of your children who failed to meet your expectations in any of these important skill areas would be told that they lack "grit" and that their failure to swim the backstroke was due to the fact that they had a fixed mindset that made them insist on going forward instead.

Discipline would definitely be easier. If your child misbehaved, you could simply call the school and tell them to keep her or him there for the next few days. Repeated offences would have them staying at school permanently.

Finally, when all else failed, parents would not have to take any responsibility for their lack of success in parenting. After all, they could just blame the school. Oh, wait a minute, they already do that!

Let's face it, following the principle of in loco schola makes little sense for parents. But, maybe if we educators really believed in the importance of in loco parentis, we could consider following a different kind of approach when working with our students. In fact, what if we really acted like parents? What if every school treated each child as if her or his success was critically important to us? What if we actively searched for ways in which every student could learn effectively? What if our first response was always to believe what a child says and not try to pick apart their stories? What if we respected the fact that family life is complex, and that not every night at home is going to be conducive for completing homework? What if we stopped playing children off of one another with stars and stickers and class rankings and pep rallies? What if we acted the way that we expect our students' parents to act- to be supportive, to communicate regularly, to check agendas and sign homework, to encourage, to give second (and third and fourth) chances - to treat our students with dignity and respect; and, to assess their work as an instructional tool - not as a judgement of individual worth?

You see, in loco parentis is not actually a legal construct at all, it is a philosophy of teaching and learning. The more that schools and administrators and teachers become cheerleaders, coaches and advocates for children, rather than taking on the roles of judge, jury and executioner, the better the chance they have for success. 

No, parents should not act like schools. And, for their part, schools must not take on the role of parents, but rather must embrace each parent's belief in her or his individual child. That is the true measure of the home/school partnership, and the secret for student success.









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Where does my child fit?

3/6/2015

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It's funny how two seemingly disparate experiences can coalesce into a single insightful moment. Mine were, at first glance, about as different from each other as you can get. For the past couple of months, our Director of Learning Services and I have welcomed a constant parade of parents of potential students into our school. They were looking for alternatives. In some cases I  met with young couples who had little experience with formal schooling but were convinced, even by kindergarten, that the public system could not meet their child's needs. Other parents came specifically to tell me stories about how their current school (public or private) was failing their child and asking what we could do to help. For them, we were the school of second choice because their first choice had let them and their daughter or son down. It has been an enlightening, and somewhat discouraging, way to pass the winter term! 

My second experience took place last Friday when I joined a group of our current parents in the library at the school and we listened to one of our resident psychologists. She was discussing anxiety (for both students and parents) and the paralyzing effect that it can have on learners. The common thread that linked many of the parents at both events was a general dissatisfaction with the level of community support available for children with Learning Differences. Now, given the fact that this is the area of specialization for our school, it is hardly surprising that I would be speaking with current parents who had left their previous school for ours, and potential parents who were looking for a change. Having said that, there was a recurring theme in the stories that I was hearing that made me pause to consider why we find ourselves, in the second decade of the twenty-first century, still struggling to meet the needs of all of the learners in our care. It was also revealing to meet a generation of new parents who were not even willing to give public education much of a chance. They had become convinced, for a variety of reasons, that their only real alternative was to pay for their child's schooling.

For twenty-five years, I worked in the public system in Ontario as a teacher, Head of Special Education, Principal and Superintendent of Schools. I knew many outstanding and dedicated educators, saw excellent programmes in operation, and witnessed wonderful things happening for students with a broad range of learning needs. There were fantastic things going on for the children in those schools, and the same is still true of many schools today.

So why the dissatisfaction? Why is my school full with a waiting list and why are so many parents searching for alternatives for their children? The answer is as simple as it is depressing. As educators and schools we know what to do, but we just don't do it consistently enough from building to building. For children and their parents, education - public and private - often becomes a matter of "luck of the draw". If your child's needs meet the programme in place in your local public school or independent school of choice then everything works out well. If they don't, it doesn't! 

Some critics would contend that it is all about money. Independent schools or schools from affluent neighbourhoods can provide the resources that less fortunate schools can't. People point to technology, class size, library collections, labs - all the trappings, and decry the disparities among schools.
 
Some would contend that it is restrictive versus open admissions. Schools that are faced with serving everyone who comes in the door have a tougher job than those that can pick and choose their clientele.

Some point their finger at external constraints - Ministry funding, School District decision-making, union contacts - as getting in the way of serving students.

The only problem with any of these factors is that they don't explain why some schools succeed in this regard while others fail miserably. There are great schools, doing amazing things for a wide range of students, who would be on the "losing" end of each of those equations above. But they still pull it off! Conversely, there are "rich" schools with minimal constraints from Ministries and unions that don't deliver the goods.

So what's the answer? It all comes down to people, individual teachers and administrators, who make it happen for the students in their schools. If there is a culture in a school that embraces students who learn differently, that welcomes dialogue with parents and external professionals, that is willing to try different approaches until they find something that works - then that is the place where you want to send your child! Ultimately, success in school is about "fit".

When students leave our school, one of the most critically important parts of the process is a transition meeting between our support team and the staff of the receiving school. We sit down with them and the student's parents to outline the accommodations that we have found can help to make that particular child successful. For the new school, it is a chance for them to reflect on, and commit to, the supports that they can put in place. For our parents it is an opportunity to make sure that the school fits their child.

Sending our students on to their next level of education, into a learning environment she or he will "belong", is one of the most important final services that we can perform for our kids. It is the key to their future school success.

At the end of the day, it is all about fit.

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    Author

    Dr. Jim Christopher is recently retired Head of Kenneth Gordon Maplewood School and Maplewood Alternative High School in North Vancouver. A parent, author and long-time teacher, and educational administrator across Canada, he has been actively involved in the drive to differentiate learning experiences to meet the needs of all learners.

    View my profile on LinkedIn

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